Friends?

Have you ever had a friend turn on you? Well, I have and what I discovered is true friends are hard to find.
One of my so called friends. This person is not capable of being a friend. She is a liar and has tried to ruin my good name. If I have a problem with someone I go to them and try to resolve it. She couldn't do this - no, because that us what a friend would do.
Anyway this "so called friend" filed the following complaints of me along with another person, who I never considered as a friend. she was a just member of my staff, but I did not know she had a problem with me. I especially did not know she would go along with such lies and deceit.

You live and learn, here are the complaints:

October 17, 2008
Ms. Cook met with Probate Judge/Commission Chairman KB, RA, GD and BW, Human Resources Director in September 2008 to discuss work issues and improve staff work relationships. Since that meeting the following complaints have been made by staff:

Allegations that immediately following meeting with Judge B and Ms. W XXX has become a hostile work environment in which there is harassment, verbal abuse, and staff is addressed with abusive demeanor from the XXX Director, Addresses staff in a “harsh, abusive and threatening manner.”

Alleges Ms. C called a staff meeting following meeting with Judge B and told them that she was tired of people talking behind her back and was looking for another job. Stated to staff that she “could not work with people who did not trust her and would not work with people she couldn't trust. Told staff to learn all the could about XXX so they would know what to do when she was gone.(Staff feels this was a most unprofessional way to handle situation.)

Allegations that Ms. C makes demeaning, sarcastic remarks to others, regarding staff. (i.e. RA scheduling training, etc.)

Allegations of Ms. C making sarcastic remarks to staff and addresses staff in a condescending tone regarding work matters. ( i.e. RA regarding Agenda).

Both Ms. A and Ms. D allege that they are excluded from day-to-day activities and operational updates. States Ms. C (Director) doesn't want staff to know anything. Wants control and no one in her way.

Ms. D feels that since Ms. A is Deputy Director, she should be Ms. C's “right hand”, but states that Ms. C doesn't included Ms. A in anything. Feels she “appears to want staff to fail, so that she can get all “fame and glory”, rather than credit going to a team effort.

Alleges that Ms. C continues to E-mail versus directly communicate with staff. Did not inform them directly that she was taking 2 weeks vacation starting Sept 26, 2008. Stated they found out through E-mail.

Staff does not want to report to work daily because of tense, hostile environment.

Here is my response to these ridiculous complaints that are nothing but fabrications:



Date: October 18, 2008



RE: Response to Complaints


1. I do not believe that XXX is a hostile work environment. I do believe there is a degree of animosity in the air, the bulk of which I feel is directed towards me. Ms. A does not accept constructive criticism of her job performance very well and makes it a personal issue. I deny the allegations that I have addressed RA or GD in a "harsh, abusive and threatening manner".

2. I did instruct Ms. A and Ms. D to learn about emergency management by taking the on line courses and asking questions because it is part of their job. As Deputy Director Ms. A would need to step up in the event of my absence, and it would be pertinent for her to know this information. I feel that I handle all aspects of this job in a forthright and professional manner.

3. I have not made demeaning, sarcastic remarks to others, regarding staff. Please contact Ms R if additional verification is needed. Aside from that, it is difficult to respond to allegations based on feelings and how another individual interprets my remarks and tone. I can only respond based on how the remarks and tone was intended.

4. I also deny the allegations of sarcastic remarks to staff and addressing staff in a condescending tone regarding work matters. I am very thorough in my job and if someone tells me one thing (i.e that the information Ms. A got from her training would be beneficial to other agencies) and then when I try to implement that by suggesting it be put on the agenda and Ms. A says that’s not necessary, I question that and ask Ms. A one more time to make sure we are on the same page. I do not believe that is condescending, I just believe it is doing my job serving the XXXXXXXXX to the best of my ability.

5. I deny the allegations that I exclude my staff from day-today activities and operational updates. I include Ms. A and Ms. D in all relevant XXX activities and keep them updated to the best of my ability. We have had several staff meetings and general discussions. I encourage them to ask questions and I answer their questions to the best of my ability. I deny the allegations that "I do not want staff to know anything". I encourage my staff to participate in training opportunities, exercises, meetings, etc (please see the response to complaint # 2). I have written step by step procedures for almost all aspects of day to day operations and emergency operations. Ms. A has expressed her dislike for procedures, however that is the basis of XXX. The staff has access to procedural check lists, standard operating guidelines, emergency operation plans, etc. I encourage the staff to educate themselves by taking on line Independent Study courses.
I do not understand the allegation of, "wants control and no one in her way"; therefore I can not provide a response.

6. I deny the allegations that "I do not include Ms. A in anything". Due to the animosity I explained in my response to the first complaint, Ms. A is reluctant and unwilling to effectively communicate with me. Her negative attitude hinders our interaction and collaboration. On several occasions, I have asked Ms. A to provide input and ideas. If I chose to modify, enhance or do not utilize her ideas, she becomes irritated, withdrawn and will not provide her full participation. I face a difficult challenge with Ms. A as my "right hand". I have tried everything I know to do to the best of my ability. I have asked Judge B for advice, but he told me that it will all work out. Perhaps I need training on how to deal with a difficult employee. I received some information on such training available in Alabama and would be very willing to take advantage of it.
I do not fully understand the statement, "appears to want staff to fail, so that she can get all "fame and glory", rather than credit going to a team effort. If my staff fails, that is a bad reflection on me and I take great pride in the success of our program. I do not seek fame and glory. I am very modest and feel embarrassed by praise and compliments.

7. I deny the allegations that I continue to E-mail versus directly communicate with my staff. Whenever possible, I provide direct verbal communications with Ms. A and Ms. D, followed up by email. I forward Ms. A and Ms. D all State XXX correspondence I receive via email. It has always been my experience that email or notes or memos are a good supplement to verbal communication. With everything that goes on in a day at the XXX office, it is very easy to forget a conversation that happened only moments ago. Therefore, I like to email for my benefit and for the benefit of others so that nothing falls through the cracks.
I deny the allegation that I did not inform them directly that I was taking 2 weeks vacation starting September 26, 2008. I followed the normal protocol, checked the calendars, had all of my forms filled out and approved and upon that approval told my staff. I left the key to my truck with Ms. A.

8. As for the staff stating that they do not want to come to work due to the “tension and hostile work environment”, no one likes to work around tension and ill-will. I am not excluded from this, it is not always pleasant for me but it is my job and as a professional I put that ahead of my personal feelings. I regret that Ms. A and Ms. D did not come to me directly with their concerns and complaints.
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I just hope maybe someone will learn from my experience. Yes I am glad that I am no longer employed there. I worked my butt off while they say back and criticized everything. I hope they can sleep at night and look at themselves in the mirror.